Snowpocalypse 2010

“Measurements and snow” always remind me of a story… if I might be indulged?
It was about 1980-81ish (Let’s feature about thirty years ago to be accurate). Weatherman Alex Popadinos had retired from WLOS. Bob Caldwell was living down his years as “Bumbo the Clown.”  ”Mr. Bill,” having crashed a few too many Cessnas on Beaver Lake Golf Course was now “balloonmeister” of the “Thirtoon Balloon. (Silly wabbit! A Cessna is gin and Dubonette, not bourbon!)  This era predated the rumors that Bob Ingle had an “arrangement” with the station to forecast snow. The local demographic took “their news and weather quite serious” while they waited for “their show,” “Bowling for Dollars.” (“BFD” would be replaced by the syndicated “Wheel of Fortune” a few years later, hosted by another weatherman, Pat Sajak.)  This was about the same time that a young Darcel appeared on the 11PM newscast.
Enter a new fresh face to WLOS. The new young weatherman “tweaked quite a few meters,” those gaydars confirmed when he began to make appearances at the local “Cha Cha Palace” after the late newscast. Brian, my “future ex at the time” had an endearing manner of channeling Paul Lynde after he had consumed a few cocktails. One particular evening in good spirits Brian acknowledged the arrival of the young weatherman to be curtly corrected that he was “the meteorologist!” I do recall the drive home and listening to “Uncle Arthur” curse “that arrogant twinkie.” (Brian and the new weatherman were the same age and became rivals in that fact.)
Until this time most of our beloved local weathermen had doubled in other roles, mostly as clowns hosting cartoon shows or Bill Norwood in a cape as “Count Shockula” hosting “Shock Theater.” Weather forecasting was not an exact science, more hit and miss.
Brian, rest his soul, had a wickedly irreverent and mischievous sense of humor matched only by his long memory and patience. One evening I stopped by Ingle’s to fight for bread and milk. The first snow had been forecast. When I arrived home an excited Brian hurried me to in to the television to catch the late weather report.
Brian was filled with glee when the young weatherman said, “Brian Burden in Candler reports that he has eight inches!” There wasn’t a flake of snow. The young weatherman’s, I mean, “meteorologist’s”  tenure at WLOS was short lived.